She's got a head full of plastic hair
Just like that woman on channel 2
You know that woman on the channel 2 news
You know that woman all the anchormen do

She's not smart like Eleanor
She's kinda dumb like Monica
30 years in the American sun
Have clearly left their mark on her

Where did get that English Accent
Where did she learn to hold her fork?
She's never been outside the USA
She's never even been to New York

She's got those haunted Alison eyes
She doesn't knows the words to honey jar
She's got those jagged Katie teeth
She dresses like she's Johnny Marr