Could've been an ice cream man
Oh yeah, I've got what it takes
Could have put the plastic bobbins on the Christmas cakes
Could have made some fun mistakes
I could've been a junkie man
Instead of a mindless cubicle monkey
'Cuz that's just what I am

Drowning in a sea of paperwork, baby
I'm workin' outta two sets of books
I drive downtown in my brand new Chevy
But things aren't how they look
Got new suits and take-out lunches
But I'm down on my luck
I've got to learn to roll with the punches
I've gotta get my numbers up

Standin' over by the water-cooler
So many things on my list
Could have been a fireman
Or an erotic hypnotist

Drowning in a sea of red tape, baby
I never learned how swim
Big boys kickin' sand in my face
No time to go to the gym
Shiny cufflinks and new tie tack
But I'm down on my luck
I've got to learn to roll with the punches
I've gotta get my numbers up

Sweatin' all day like a Fishtown farmer
Standing by the side of the road
I could have been a construction worker
If could carry the load
Could've made some fun mistakes
And still landed where I am
Another mindless cubicle monkey
'Cuz that's just what I am

Drowning in a sea of paperwork, baby
I'm workin' outta two sets of books
I drive downtown in my brand new Chevy
But things aren't how they look
Got new suits and take-out lunches
But I'm down on my luck
I've got to learn to roll with the punches
I've gotta get my numbers up