"He murdered his nanny because he mistook her for his wife
His wife was pretty mad, I think"

The day is great, I'm feeling fine
I won't be late, be there 'fore nine
All the splender that you see is mine
Done a bunk and left my washing on the line

Well, I'm not a punk
And I'm not a skiver
Well, Lucan didn't need it
And I don't need it either

Congratulate the sun to shine
Anticipate and it's the sign
We're all grapes ripe to be picked from the vine
I left my clothes on the beach and an empty bottle of wine

Well, I'm not a punk
And I'm not a skiver
Well, Lucan didn't need it
And I don't need it either

Slow coach, snail trail down the lane
Traffic jam and again
Lost luggage, junk mail, pouring a rain
Brought me down again

Investigate scene of the crime
On my own estate, said I'll be gone a long time
While they're out looking, I'm drinking tequila and lime
Since I took off in search of that long lost sunny 'clime

Well, I'm not a punk
And I'm not a skiver
Well, Lucan didn't need it
And I don't need it either

Well, I'm not a punk
And I'm not a skiver
Well, Lucan didn't need it
And I don't need it either