I need some shortcuts,
So I can be the
Very best employee of all

I need some shortcuts,
So I can navigate
Office software
With lightning speed

A storm is a-brewin'
Of productivity
Inside of a cubicle
Assigned to me

The task at hand
Fall one by one
Victim to the weapons of
Mass production

(Ooh ooh,
Production ah ah)

I need some shortcuts,
So I can be the
Very best employee of all

I need some shortcuts,
So I can take this
Company to the
Next level

I scale the corporate ladder
Far in the lead,
Make it up to the top,
Kick it down to the streets

Then down from the clouds
Descends upper management,
Sparing no expense
On making an entrance

They safely land
On the corporate building roof,
And then assume position
For the final interview

(Upper management)

Opens a binder
With sliver rings of three,
Then out came a question
Somewhat suddenly

And I answered their question,
They questioned my answer,
I questioned their question,
They question my question

I sat there what seems like forever,
Just questioning answers
And answering questions

Then finally I just cut to the chase,
And asked them about my promotion

And they answered the question,
I questioned their answer,
They answered my question,
They answered my answer

And apparently no one can be
So productive
Nothing else need be produced
(Dang it!)

I'll keep that in mind at my next job,
Where my output will be
Greatly reduced