Jessica Fletcher and Lieutenant Columbo
They couldn't fathom out what's wrong with you
Captain Hastings and Hercule pyro
They couldn't fathom out what's wrong with you

You're a murder mystery
Of that, there's no doubt
And not even Quince could figure you out
You're a murder mystery
And you're freaking me out

Doctor Watson and Sherlock Holmes
They couldn't fathom out what's wrong with you
Sergeant Lewis and Juliet Bravo
They couldn't fathom out what's wrong with you

You're a murder mystery
Of that there's no doubt
Not even Quincy could figure you out
You're a murder mystery
And you're freaking me out
Yeah, you're freaking me out
Yeah, you're freaking me out
Yeah, you're freaking me out

You're a devious swine
Of that, there's no doubt
You've a criminal mind
But I'm working you out
Just give me more time

You're a murder mystery
Of that there's no doubt
And not even Quince or the dog from due South
You're a murder mystery
And you're freaking me out
You're a murder mystery
And you're freaking me out

Murder mystery
Murder mystery
Murder mystery
Murder mystery
Murder mystery
Murder mystery
Murder mystery
Murder mystery
Murder, murder

Agatha Christie and Daphne DeMaurier
They couldn't fathom out what's wrong with you
But I hope I do