This Christmas kinda sucks

This tree looks kinda high, then again so do I
Can't smoke up a mistletoe, but damn I tried
I hate this winter theme, it's 38 degrees
A bump's the only snow I'll ever see

Warming my soul with a cold stripping on the North Pole
Maybe I'm just a little too old
Ruined my nights with these lights all styrofoam white and
My gingerbread house is on fire

So sorry Mariah, Michael, I think Christmas kinda sucks
Santa's weird and reindeers are just a few UPS trucks
And I know I should be happy enough
But I'm gonna get rum drunk, Bah humbug
I think Christmas kinda sucks

Sorry Mariah, Michael, I think Christmas kinda sucks
Santa's weird and reindeers are just a few UPS trucks
And I know I should be happy enough
But I'm gonna get rum drunk, Bah humbug
I think Christmas kinda sucks

This Christmas kinda sucks

My parents hate their exes, so I split between addresses
Avoiding conversations with the last progressive
Now I hate to complain, but it's just another day
I'd rather take a brandy than a candy cane

Warming my soul with a cold stripping on the North Pole
Maybe I'm just a little too old
Ruined my nights with these lights all styrofoam white and
My gingerbread house is on fire

So sorry Mariah, Michael, I think Christmas kinda sucks
Santa's weird and reindeers are just a few UPS trucks
And I know I should be happy enough
But I'm gonna get rum drunk, Bah humbug
I think Christmas kinda sucks

Sorry Mariah, Michael, I think Christmas kinda sucks
Santa's weird and reindeers are just a few UPS trucks
And I know I should be happy enough
But I'm gonna get rum drunk, Bah humbug
I think Christmas kinda sucks

Sorry Mariah, Michael, I think Christmas kinda sucks
Santa's weird and reindeers are just a few UPS trucks
And I know I should be happy enough
But I'm gonna get rum drunk, Bah humbug
I think Christmas kinda sucks