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Funny Musical Teacher Lyrics - Artist : Mancuso, Rudy
[Student:]
Hello? [Teacher:] I'm a musical teacher And I'm here to spread some knowledge I can make you really smart So your dumb ass can go to college Math, English, Science, Spanish, Sexual Education World Wars, Algebra, Shakespeare and condensation [Student:] Why am I the only person here? [Teacher:] Don't be a bitch Have no fear I'm going to teach you so much shit You couldn't learn in a year [Student:] This is ridiculous [Teacher:] Ridiculous, periculous, meticulous These are all adjectives See grammar is limitless [Student:] Okay I get it Could we just start [Teacher:] If you really want to take my class Then you have to sing or I'm afraid you won't pass [Student:] I'm not singing [Teacher:] Oh, that answer makes me very sad Cause I'm gonna have to call your mom and dad [Student:] Are you serious? [Teacher:] Fuck, fuck, yes [Student:] Why? [Teacher:] I'm your teacher and I know what's best [Student:] Okay man, are you happy now? [Teacher:] Holy cow [Student:] It seems like you got me to sing somehow Please get on with this class Cause you're really really starting to be a pain in my ass [Teacher:] I'm telling you that learning is fun You'll be the smartest mother fucker in the world when I'm done [Student:] How? [Teacher:] Knowledge is power [Student:] Sorry for being sour [Teacher:] I got a whole hour [Student:] You can't convince me that [Both:] Learning is fun fun fun fun fun fun fun Fun fun fun fun Learning is really fucking fun fun fun fun Fun fun fun fun Fun fun fun fun fun fun Really really really fucking fucking fun [Student:] All right so where do we start [Teacher:] Let's talk about World War II [Student:] Was it cool? [Teacher:] It was a really really really shitty time to be a Jew The year was 1932 [Student:] What happened? [Teacher:] When Hitler came to power and he acted like a douche Pearl Harbor was attacked in '41 [Student:] That sucks [Teacher:] Then a couple weeks later, USA joined the fun The whole damn world began shooting one another [Student:] Shit [Teacher:] Shit is right Let's be nice to each other [Student:] So why should I care about this World War stuff? [Teacher:] Cause if we make the same mistakes Then shit would really really suck [Student:] I'm just happy that we're no longer in 1932 [Teacher:] I'm just glad we don't have Hitler Cause damn [Both:] He was such a freakin douche Douchy douche douche Douchy douchy douche douch Douche douchy douche douche Douchy douche douche Hitler was a douche Douchy douche douche Douchy douchy douche douche Douche douchy douche douche Douchy douche douche Hitler was a douche [Teacher:] If I take this tube of weird blue shit And I put this red stuff inside of it Well then wow [Student:] Whoa [Teacher:] There you go [Student:] Was that a chemical reaction? [Teacher:] Yup Science is dope [Student:] I guess [Teacher:] Take this can of flammable shit And combine it with this lighter I can make shit lit baby Boom [Student:] What the hell? [Teacher:] Now, wasn't that swell? I'll tell you man Science can be cool as hell Science is cool, yeah [Both:] Science is cool I said science is cool, yeah Science is cool Science is cool, yeah Science is cool I said science is cool, yeah Science is cool [Student:] Yeah That was weird [Teacher:] Math is the shit Because it's always all around you Numbers, calculations and equations will astound you Two times two is [Student:] Four [Teacher:] And my ex-girlfriend is a whore But it's cool Ten minus seven is [Student:] Three [Teacher:] And that was my age when my dad left me Half of twenty is [Student:] Ten [Teacher:] You know I only have one friend And it's you Five times a hundred fifty million two-hundred ninety-six thousand seven hundred ninety three is [Student:] Uh, I have no idea [Teacher:] Great [Both:] Math is the shit Because it's always all around you Numbers, calculations and equations will astound you Yeah [Teacher:] It's time to wrap this up I think this class is now dismissed [Student:] Well I don't think that I've ever enjoyed learning quite like this [Teacher:] Man I hope that you learned something That you never learned before [Student:] I learned that Hitler was a douchebag And your girlfriend was a whore [Both:] We can all learn something From a formal education [Student:] I think I'm ready for graduation [Teacher:] Actually we have a bit of a situation [Student:] What? [Teacher:] I'm not a, I'm not a real teacher [Student:] Wait, what? [Teacher:] So [Student:] I need this class to gradate [Teacher:] I'm sorry bro |
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