I'll come to town for you
Dress up like a clown for you
Pull my pants on down for you
Then I'll crawl away
I will blow hot fart on you
I will build an R2-D2
I won't even start for you
Unless you fucking pay

'Cause I am the performer
'Cause I am the performer
'Cause I am the performer
I am the performer
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I will come to town for you
Dress up like a clown for you
Try not to fuck around on you
Do so anyway
I will find the Ark for you
And go sleep in the park with you
I'll even suck a cock or two
But no sir, I'm not gay

'Cause I am the performer
I am the performer
I am the performer
Simply the performer

Before I was a whore, on tour
I was the child always running around
With his dick hanging out and his diapers pulled down
Showbiz was calling, I hit the stage
Worked out an act where I got raped in a cage
But my life was bullshit but I didn't care
Went to go bowling and I missed on my spare

But what else could I fucking do
But play another song for you?
Thinking about a nose job, too

'Cause I am the performer
I am the performer
I am the performer
Simply the performer