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The Naked Mole Rap Lyrics - Artist : Bull, Dan
Oi you're about to learn about
The fucking naked mole rat Fuck all the other animals They're old hat I'm bringing solid gold facts And I'm not gonna hold back It's a whole new genre I'ma call it naked mole rap Check it one two, check it One two, check it They're not rats or moles They're not rats or moles But they're definitely nekkid I know they look scarily like 'em But they're not dicks Dicks don't move their teeth Independently like chopsticks Looks can be deceiving 'Cause they're anything but soft If they were then they probably Wouldn't be feeding their tots shit Or sleeping in a moshpit Like narcoleptic rock chicks Blinder than a bat But they don't even need their optics 'Cause they can smell a rat Like he just lit a joss stick Live long in tip top condition Hear the clock tick You're jealous of these hairless fellas So follow this top tip You mess with them and it'll hurt Like you fell on your coccyx Unlike the puny human brain These dudes are just immune to pain Run straight into the fray Like you'd do in a computer game Who's afraid of rufous snakes That move to break into the place When you can take a tooth into the face And be like, "Who's this wasteman, Ruining the mood in our communal space?" Like Luda says, move bitch Get out my fooking way Their food is basically Just super great big new potatoes Saying I can't communicate How beautiful this tuber tastes I never want to brush either tooth Don't need a tube of paste Plus they run the red light district Check the zoo displays So best watch your step in the neighborhood Of heterocephalus glaber cuz Or you'll be made to change your name To a new one like Bethany Davis does Beware 'cause they're braying for blood And they're ready to cripple a crip It's as if you were Dre and they're Suge What? you thought this was, A hereditary monarchy? Nah, the queen hustled hard And took over the colony Survival of the fittest This is what she's good at Rising up the ranks By fucking up the other hood rats These OGs roll deep Up to three hundred soldiers Each keep to their role In the mole fleet But this isn't Sparta This is modern day Somalia So if there's pirates hearing this shit You aren't so hard are you? They live in massive burrows As big as actual boroughs They're sabre-toothed sausages That's David fricking Attenborough These crafty buggers Are the only mammal packing blood That's cold so they're literally Cold blood bastards, that's another fact They're as good at back up As running forward From the sound of it They run the underground That's blooming baller Let me tell you something awful Old age is coming for you And it's unavoidable for us But your boys are immortal Oxygen's an option They can take it or leave it They safely respirate In places apes couldn't breathe in And have you ever seen A naked mole rat getting cancer? No you haven't so don't try To give a different answer Have you ever had the thought How the name "naked mole rats" Sounds like a Kevin Smith parody With an adult cast Mother nature baked these babies Up on full blast And any lame attempt to be greater Than them'll fall flat So fucking fall back fool Before you feel the full wrath Of the motherfucking Buck naked mole rats This is a rap About the naked mole rat In case you didn't know already And so I guess that I just have to name it The naked mole rap It's a pun This is a rap About the naked mole rat That's fairly obvious And so I guess that I just have to name it The naked mole rap The naked mole rap |
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